How awful a thought. That I would question my devotion, love and sincerity to the very One who has set me free.
But it’s true. I go through seasons when I do, and it hurts!
Although my bias is to place needless pressure on myself to have answers for such questions, I’m leaning towards accepting that I won’t always find them. What’s strange is that while in my mind I know and believe that God is the boss, the reality is that I still live with doubt ~ much doubt.
But how can this be? How can I say that I trust God and yet I find myself wrestling scepticism?
I don’t have the answer.
The challenge is to find liberation that results from knowing that it’s okay to live with the tension of uncertainty, and to discern that this same tension can be the catalyst that drives me to my knees in desperation of my God.
Questions of what the future holds, what direction to take, what my purpose in life is, and how to get there, can be debilitating. As such, growing conscious of their grip and being reminded of the soveriengty of God is imperative to my sanity.
I must determine that if doubt equates to a questioning of my devotion, love and sincerity to Christ, and living with a vagueness of the plans God has for me, then doubt I must learn to live with. If becoming acquainted with ifs and maybes in life is part of the journey towards destiny, then so be it.
I’ll grow familiar with doubt.
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1 comments:
God understands our doubts, and the most important thing I can tell you is that He wants to take them away and increase our faith. Do you remember Thomas, who was one of Jesus' closest disciples? When others told him that Jesus had been raised from the dead after His crucifixion, Thomas refused to believe it. He declared, "Unless I see the nail marks in his hands and put my finger where the nails were, and put my hand into his side, I will not believe it" (John 20:25).
How did Jesus respond? He didn't rebuke Thomas or tell him just to have more faith. Instead, Jesus came to him and showed him that He was alive. The response was immediate: "Thomas said to him, 'My Lord and my God!'" (John 20:28). Tradition says Thomas became an evangelist and preached the Gospel as far as India.
When doubts come, don't let them take root in your soul. Instead, turn them over to Christ. Most of all, saturate your heart and mind every day with the truths of God's Word, the Bible. Satan will try to turn you away, but in Christ "We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure" (Hebrews 6:19).
Love your Blog Nicholas please!Thanks for all the soul food.
God Bless
David Robinson
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